"My body is a cage, that keeps me from dancing with the one I love"

I realize that there are a certain group of people who would consider eulogizing a dog to be silly or a waste of time. And that's fine. I get that. But those people clearly never had the privilege of getting to know Rufus. As much as a black mutt from the Pound can be one of a kind, Rufus fit the bill. I met Ruf in my single days back in early 1999. I was at the SPAC looking at puppies to adopt but was far more interested in the young lady working there than in the 8 week old lab-ish looking puppy with the bright eyes. Somewhere between flirting with the SPAC girl and trying t0 keep this little black puppy from climbing up my leg, I ended up going home with a new friend. Over the next ten years Rufus was with me on countless adventures. He was my roommate, my sounding board for anything going on in my life, and my jogging partner. We bonded over countless beers (I mostly drank the beers...but he was there). He saw me through my single years and was the only one who truly knew who I was or wasn't dating at any given time. In his later years Ruf fell in love with two new ladies in our lives. The first was my new wife, who he diligently protected when I was out of town for work. The second, a precocious young yellow lab puppy named Bella who he immediately embraced as part of the family. We spent our last night together as we had so many others, sitting together on the couch with a beer, watching a baseball game.

Rufus will be remembered as an avid hunter of squirrels and Jack Russell Terriors. He was a staunch defender of.....whatever it was he cared about, occasionally smacking down fools who dared to cross him. But there was a softer a side as well. He was a gentleman of leisure who enjoyed nothing more than sitting in the yard, baking in the sun for hours on end. His name will inevitably come up in any future discussion of "Greatest Dogs To Have Ever Lived", and one day children will sing songs of tribute to him. In the interim, Rufus will be sorely missed by both me and others.

Rufus 11/29/1998 - 6/19/2008.

"Smell ya later...forever", bro.

I Hate Stupid People and Things

Anyone who knows me, knows I am prone to a rant every now and again. Basically, I am smarter than pretty much everyone so lots of dumb things irritate the hell out of me. Two particular things have raised my ire of late.

1. The local Sons of Confederate Veterans have erected a large flag pole near the interstate and affixed a large Confederate battle flag on said pole. Why do I care? Well, because any time a Confederate flag story comes up, idiots abound. First of all, if you read my first two sentences carefully, you will notice I refer to the flag as a "Confederate" battle flag...it's proper name. It is not, nor was it ever, a "Rebel" flag. Anyone referring to it as one is simply, horribly uneducated.

Where it really gets maddening is in the fight these things incite. Here's the deal: You have toothless rednecks saying ludicrous things like "It's about heritage." Now, you and I know as well as they do (which is why they do it) that the flag is going to cause a stir. Maybe they do it for the press, but I think they want to irritate people. That's exactly why as someone who is eligible for the SCV, I have never considered it...it's an organization with an interesting mission, but is instead full of hillbillies.

Then of course you have the minority community who have made it their mission to make Americans feel like as a citizen you have the right to never be offended. Of course they are too stupid to realize you can't have that right and have a First Amendment. Then you get the minority "representative" (I'm looking at you Jesse and Al) who come a-calling. Interestingly, of all the minorities I know, Jesse and Al are about the least representative of any them. Look, when someone is wronged, it's simply wrong...I just don't think a flag can do that.

Now for some education. At the end of the War Between the States (it can't be a civil war when it's two countries) Gen. Lee agreed to fold up the flags and they would never return. Years later a Gen. Nathan Bedford Forrest started the KKK and the flags came back out. However, a little research would tell you Forrest was only for preserving a Southern way of life (without slavery by the way) and state's rights. He was also very opposed to the punitive nature of the Reconstruction. The same research would tell you that when the KKK went awry and started going toward all out hate...Forrest left. Don't miscontrue anything I'm saying here...I think the KKK is one of the worst things is this country. I think they are by and large poor, uneducated hicks that have no capacity for improving their lives so they hate other people. They are in no uncertain terms...despicable.

So, now we have a flag that was a battle flag that apparently is a symbol of hate and maybe that reputation is rightful as a result of idiocy years ago. I blame everyone in this mess, because everyone's desire is rile other people up. The simple solution would be for those of Confederate heritage to fly proper national flags of the Confederacy (like the Stars and Bars...that's right the Stars and Bars is not the same flag as the battle flag...again, educate yourself). But then, nobody would know what that is...and that's why I don't think the SCV motives are pure.

2. Spygate. The next time some controversy breaks out and some idiot media guy labels it with a -gate suffix, I might bash in my TV. Clearly this a reference to Watergate. But am I the only one that knows Watergate was not a controversy that erupted over water? (Stay tuned though, that controversy is coming soon to Middle East near you). Watergate was (and still is) the full, proper name of a hotel and convention center, for all of you young'uns who don't know that. You can't just take the end of that, make it a suffix and suddenly it's a synonym for controversy.

If we did that for everything we would be living in a world of gates. Think about it...we have Gasgate right now, there's Iraqgate to deal with, there's Refgate in the NBA, Replaygate in MLB and Flopgate in international soccer. Hell, just the other night my wife and I had Dinnergate and we had to flip a coin for restaurants.

Does all of that sound stupid? Exactly, so stop f---ing doing it! IDIOTS!

"Last night I heard a Siren's song, and I followed it in the ditch"

Last week I left for a conference down in Ft. Lauderdale. While I was gone, the Mrs. left for a business trip to California so I returned to an empty house. Being a temporary bachelor, I did what most guys would do in my situation, ate my weight in barbeque and drank most of the bourbon in this fair 'burg. I currently feel bloated and near death. I have drank approximatley 67 liters of water today, so I'm feeling pretty good about my prospects for tomorrow. Fingers crossed that I'll survive being home alone until Sunday.