One of my good friends (a member of this blog) has a bit of an edge to him. If he's been drinking and the wrong guy at the wrong time and place comes along, my amigo is ready to fight. The good thing is, he is usually too wasted to actually do it or calmer heads prevail and we go back to drinking.
So what's my point? Generally speaking, I am one of the calmer heads. Don't get me wrong, I am an idiot and I will do just about anything. It's just that fighting to me isn't glamorous or fun. Actually, fights hurt and pain ain't cool.
However, Kevin Youkilis must be the quintessential wrong guy and time and place for me. Every time I see him I want to bash his head in. I am not sure if it's sphincter hair goatee or the stupid way Red Sux fans chant "Yoooooouuuuk" every time he is announced. I am pretty sure part of it is that ridiculous hands apart, 12 year old female softball player dance / stance he has at the plate.
Whatever the cause, whatever the reason that ass clown makes my pacifist blood boil. Chances are, it's because he plays for a sports team that I have never hated anything more than. 90% of Sux fans have never been to Boston and the other 10% are on parole. They sucked (I mean really, out loud sucked) for 84 years. After 2 Series wins these frontrunners crawl out of the woodwork with their sideways, flat billed "B" hats. And then, of all things, have they have the audacity to call a Rays fan obnoxious. Ummm, sure buddy.
Anyway, I would fight Kevin Youkilis. Stay tuned to the sequels to this post: "Manny Ramirez Wears Hammer Pants," "Jason Papelbon Likes Barbara Streisand," "My 6 Month Old Throws Harder than Wakefield," and "Jason Varitek and His "C" Jersey Drive a Fusion."
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